* You measure distance in minutes

* Weather is 80% of your conversation

* Down south to you means Missouri

* Snow tires are standard on your car

* You have no concept of public transportation

* 75% of your graduating high school class went to college "down to Iowa City"

* You know several persons who have hit a deer

* You have no problem spelling "Des Moines"

* You have no problem pronouncing "Des Moines"

* You know the answer to the question, "Is this Heaven ?"

* Your school classes were canceled because of cold

* Your school classes were canceled because of heat

* You know what the numbers I-80, 280 & 380 mean

* You know what "uff-da" means & how to use it properly

* You know where all the Yoders live

* You've licked frozen metal

* The only reason you go to Missouri is for fireworks (or football games)

* You wear shorts when it's 50 degrees out in March, but bundle up and complain in August when it goes below 60 degrees

* You have gone Trick-or-Treating in two feet of snow

* You carry jumper cables in your car

* You drink "POP"

* In a conversation you heard someone say "oh yah you betcha" or "not once ever even" and you don't laugh

* You know exactly where "Field of Dreams" was filmed

* People from other states love to hear you say "Iowa" and other words with "O's" in them

* You know what "Hawks" and "Clones" are

* When someone says they are going out for dinner or supper, you know exactly which meal they are talking about

* You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows

* You think a hot topic of conversation is last night's tractor pull

* When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say, "It was different."

* Being a bit younger, you remember Terry Branstad as governor the whole time you were growing up

* Being a bit older, you remember Harold Hughes as governor the whole time you were growing up

* You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor

* When you lock your front door, you put the key in the mailbox

* Your cousin's visit from California makes the local newspaper

* You know the difference between a "storm door" and a "storm cellar"

* Your house has a basement, and you've spent quite a bit of time there over the years, waiting for tornados to blow over

* You think the governor of Minnesota is "a little much"

* You know everything that's going on in the world, you're on the Internet, and you're well-read, but you rarely leave home