A Birthday Pome from the Dog:

You feed me when I'm hungry,
You keep water in my dish,
You let me sleep on anything,
Or in any place I wish.

You sometimes let me lick your hands,
Or even lick your face,
Despite the fact I've licked myself,
In every private place.

You taught me how to come when called,
You taught me how to sit,
You always let me go outside,
So I can take a shit stroll.

I've been with you through oh, so much,
Through laughter and through tears,
I hope you live to be a hundred,
That's 700 in doggy years.